One More Time

Posted by   Schilo67   |   Categories :   An Addicts Perspective

Hello everyone. It has been a while. The last time I was on this site was about 10 months ago.  So in order to catch you back up I have to go a little further back to the year 2016. Actually I could go further back then that. But today I am only going back as ar as suited for this post.

Addicts being addicted, relapse relapse prevention. To relapse. These words they sit pretty heavy on me. To a normy those words don ‘t affect him like they do me and you. I have never been ashamed to say I  am in addict. You damn well better believe that I wore that fucking title proudly.

Looking back now I realize,anonymity.N.A. A.A.Any type of hang up could be considered an addiction, So here is where I come in. This all started back in 2011.That’s when I met the mama of my youngest daughter.Looking back I keep asking myself what was I Thinking.And usually after 3 seconds I have a grin on my face. Remembering why.

When I met K, Even knowing this with eyes wide open. As an addict all I saw was this hot little Guera (blonde).Feeling  like Don Quixote. Slaying all the dragons.Or so I thought. I should of known better.Before you knew it this  women was living with me. Now is when it got out of control.Not only did I have my addiction to control but I also had hers.Unfortunately I didn’t know to what  extreme my so called partner in crime was?  Before you knew it we were deep in schitt!

You know looking back from then till now 2011 to 2017.Many things have taken there course. And most of it has been a pile of poop. My babies mom is being baby sat by the state of Colorado.I myself has seen more down than ups. No matter how much you want to coat it being an addict is a daily struggle. And to believe that you can do it on your own. No don’t fool yourself.Thinking you look good in reality you look like schitt you feel like schitt and you smell like schitt.

You know I write these posts more for myself than anyone else if you get something out of this which I hope you do.So with that I am going to end this by saying Keep Your Head Up If Not You May Bump Into Something.

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October 4, 2017

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